I intended to go over and take a photo of the sign outside of the bar that said: Safe Sex Games 18+ Welcome. Actually, I did go over to take the picture but I was too late – they had already changed their sign to some other outrageous offering for their 18+ clientele. Fortunately (or unfortunately depending on your point of view) they had a picture of their poster online.
It seems that every day in the news there is another sex scandal dealing with the military or with politicians (although mostly with the military). There is infidelity, there is sexual assault, there is sexual harassment, and there are those that view porn on their workplace computers (among other concerns). As upset as people claim to be about this it would seem like such actions would be such an aberration from the norm that to hear of a single offense would send shock waves through the system. Instead, if the press is even reasonably accurate in its reporting, these actions are commonplace. It has caused a lot of people to ask why. It has caused the Secretary of Defense, Chuck Hagel, to issue a directive for military personnel to sweep the workplace looking for materials that could be considered sexually offensive or explicit. The Army Times article about the directive listed a good number of magazines that are for sale in the Post Exchange (PX) – the on-post department store. It makes one ask, Wouldn’t it be more efficient to just wait on the other side of the cash register and confiscate the offending materials before they get from the on-post store to the on-post workplace? (Does the left hand now what the right hand is doing?)
This disparity between what you can buy at work vs what you can own at work is just one example of the dissonant cultural standards that are changing so quickly and run counter to the ethics the military (among other agencies and entities) is trying to enforce. Western culture has decided that it is OK to sell magazines where almost everything on a man’s or woman’s body is exposed (check out Maxim or your latest fitness magazine for an example – BTW Maxim and some fitness magazines are on the no-go list put out by the SecDef’s policy but yet they are for sale in the PX) to anyone regardless of age. In western culture today porn has gone mainstream. In western culture today a new verb has been created, “sexting” where people willingly send, via telephone text message pictures, explicit photos of themselves – apparently without any regard to the fact that these photos can be shared and forwarded to an endless number of people. And, as my opening sentence indicates – Western culture today allows a nightclub to advertise Safe Sex Games 18+ Welcome.
What has happened to our society when a nightclub openly advertises what appears to have been a drunken orgy with dollar shots and 2-for-1 drink specials? Has sex really been reduced to nothing more than a game? And, just what are “Safe Sex Games”? Are they speaking strictly of disease? What keeps the players safe from the emotional trauma of being sexually used and discarded? Has society really become so desensitized to sexual behavior in public to tolerate this? If so, is it any wonder that behavior in the workplace is what it is? If you go to youtube and enter “Best Movie Kiss” one of the returns (among many – many of which would have been considered too explicit for Hollywood just a few years ago) is a scene from the original Rocky. Adrianne protests Rocky’s advances and she wants to leave. Rocky blocks her in and forces himself upon her. Sexual Assault? Not according to the person who posted it as the Best Movie Kiss Ever. Does it matter that the movie has a happy ending – it shouldn’t.
No wonder there are workplace problems that won’t go away. United States Senator Weiner thinks it is OK to “sext” pictures of his genitals total strangers. People young and old alike take explicit “selfies” and sext the pictures to whomever will receive them. What was once too explicit for the inner pages of clothing catalogs, is now splattered across billboards. Club owners can advertise the fact that they are hosting drunken orgies and as long as you are at least 18 you are welcome to attend. Society has decided that this is socially acceptable behavior but holds a different standard of behavior for the workplace. A different standard of behavior without any justification for the different standard. The secular workplace cannot appeal to religious standards – that would be a labor lawsuit waiting to happen. The workplace cannot appeal to cultural norms – the culture says the forbidden activities are OK.
Society hears the news stories about outrageous sexual behavior in the military and elsewhere and wants to know when it will end. Simultaneously, the finger wagging public are doing all of the same activities and consider it their “right” and appeal to their privacy. Well, until societal standards change there will be no change in societal behaviors. Furthermore, the more entrenched the behaviors get in society the more they will spill over into the workplace.
Would society not be better if a little purity was returned – Where excitement is found in your spouse?
Song of Solomon 4:9–11
You have captivated my heart, my bride; you have captivated my heart with one glance of your eyes, with one jewel of your necklace. How beautiful is your love, my bride! How much better is your love than wine, and the fragrance of your oils than any spice! Your lips drip nectar, my bride; honey and milk are under your tongue;